Thor Needs the Ragnarok Version
Ragnarok works because its comedy sits on real loss. Thor’s joking while he loses his hammer, his eye, his father and his planet, and the jokes land because the grief’s real. Asgard’s not a place, it’s a people, says the film, and then Infinity War opens on that same ship with most of those people dead on the floor. Later films kept the jokes and dropped what was underneath them, and Endgame’s where that first went wrong. Love and Thunder’s the worst of it, Hercules has never been seen again, Jane’s in Valhalla and hasn’t been mentioned since, and if you’re prioritising, it’s the most skippable film in the project. Gorr’s argument deserved better than getting raised and settled in one film. What I want in December is the Thor from Ragnarok, funny and formidable and quietly wrecked. And the July trailer gives him that hammer back, standing in a hangar with it near the end looking like a man who’s got something to prove.
That’s why the catch bothers me as much as it does, in a good way. It’s Thor at full power, every bit of lightning he’s got, and it’s the first thing we properly see Doom do to one of the old guard. If that’s the weightless Thor from Love and Thunder, it’s just a cool shot and we all move on. If it’s the one who’s already lost a hammer, a father and a planet, getting stopped dead by one hand ought to scare him, and it ought to scare us. I’d give up a fair few of the jokes for that.
Namor, Shuri and the Guardians Who Stayed Gone
Namor’s the wildcard. In 2022 he was the antagonist of a self-contained film with an unusually good argument behind him, and in 2026 he’s an unaligned power with an intact nation, a working military and no obligations to anybody at all. I called that treaty in Wakanda Forever bad ethics and good chess, and I’d still have liked the film to look harder at the body count. The funeral at the start is still the best thing it does, and Angela Bassett’s carrying the argument that Wakanda’s a country with obligations rather than a superhero base with a throne in it. Shuri’s the one who hasn’t worked out, and it isn’t her fault, because her real strength’s always been her brains and the suit forces her into being the brawn. Namor has a long history with Sue Storm in the comics that I’d love to see them touch. Using him as a cameo, one line and a trident, would be a waste.
The Guardians are the opposite problem. Vol. 3 ends with the team gone and it’s meant it, Rocket’s captaining a roster we haven’t followed, Peter’s on Earth, Drax and Nebula are raising the children they rescued. It stayed out of the multiverse altogether, and I’d revise myself on only one thing, which is that Warlock shouldn’t have been in the movie. The argument for bringing them back is obvious enough. Doomsday’s pulling in everybody, the cosmic side of this universe is badly underrepresented, and Rocket’s got the emotional weight to hold a scene against anyone. But drop them into an ensemble event and they become five more people in a crowd scene, and the thing that makes them worth watching doesn’t survive the format.
What to Watch and What to Look For
If you’re working through this before December, start with the two Loki seasons and WandaVision, since they set the rules. Then Multiverse of Madness, Quantumania for the Kang story that didn’t happen, and First Steps for Reed and Franklin. The X-Men run comes next, Days of Future Past, Logan and Deadpool & Wolverine together, then The Marvels for that credits scene. Finish with Thunderbolts and the Captain America films for the shield question, and leave Thor and the Guardians for last, since they’re the furthest from the main line. It won’t all be needed, I know, nobody ever required homework to enjoy Thor swinging a hammer at somebody, but it’s going to make that Xavier scene hit a lot harder. And Thunderbolts is worth your time for the Sentry alone. He’s either the solution to every threat or he has to be written out of every room he’s in, and that’s the one question December can’t avoid.
Then there’s what I’ll be watching for when the lights go down. Is Steve a fighter again, or a symbol, or does he just want to go home? Does Sam hold the shield as a soldier or a negotiator, and what’s Walker bring now he’s been through a team film? Franklin’s either going to do something or he’s waiting for a cue that never comes. And with this many actors coming back, I don’t know how the film keeps its own story at the centre, which might be the biggest ask of the lot.
Which of these setups do you most want Doomsday to pay off? Tell me in the comments.
